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Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania ~

Morning walk in Virginia Manor. Tranquility along the path. Heard robins, cardinals, bluejays— birds I miss in Germany. It seemed as if they had come out to welcome me back.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Flight: Detroit, Michigan to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania ~

She sat beside me, wife of a Marine, mother of two teenagers eager to join. She was very concerned about that, but knew they would be enlisting soon. Her eyes filled. Said she was so happy that her husband had made it through Vietnam.

Over the Ocean ~

Oh, the distance! If I were not flying back to what was once home, I would feel completely lost and alone. Up over Scotland along the edge of Iceland over Newfoundland, Canada into Detroit, Michigan, to board there again for Pittsburgh. All in 9 hours. By ship it takes 8 days. Home is far away. Easier to arrive there poetically, and on a deeper level, spared of stark, unpleasant realities.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Home ~ Trip to the the U.S.A. ~

I am flying back home, to Butler, Pennsylvania, I say. But where is home? I have lived in Germany for so long. Is there really a home somewhere?

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

On the Autobahn ~

It is through longing, lacking, and pain that everything opens to us, I thought, as I sat in the back seat looking at the posh cars laden with vacation equipment passing us on the autobahn.

Monday, July 09, 2007

De diligendo Deo ~

I would be searching for You to love if I only knew I could reach You. But I don't even know Who You are. To love You I need to have something I can grasp onto.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Consolation? ~

There is more to be learned in bearing loss, the old monk said, than in the rapture of bliss.

Lausanne, Switzerland ~

It was pleasantly warm last Saturday evening as we sat in a restaurant at the edge of Lake Geneva eating fresh perch. The moon was hovering in the sky and reflecting on the calm lake. A glass of wine, a cigarette. There were long pauses in our conversaion, four or five whole minutes without a word, when we were just looking and trying to fathom the beauty of what we were seeing.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Visit to Dresden, Germany ~

I walked in the streets of Dresden, rebuilt now and magnificent after being bombed by our planes and British planes in 1945, marvelling at its new beauty — but still could hear the low hum of the bombers in the distance, coming in from the west.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Heavenly Delight ~

Did you see the chimney swallows? They’re back! Their flight absolutely delightful to watch. And when they come in groups, at high speed, curving around the trees and down across our garden, chirping, I feel the show is just for me.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Pain and Suffering ~

It is easier to associate ourselves with pain and suffering than with joy — just because we are more acquainted with them.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Turning the Tables ~

Spent a wonderful weekend with old students of mine ['82 grads] in a quaint Black Forest hotel. They lavished appreciation on me for little things I did an said back then, that they said supported them. I came away with the grateful feeling of being their student now and of being carried on their strong shoulders.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Being Poor ~ Having Everything ~

Once you have found your true love nothing else matters. You want to shed everything else to concentrate on the beloved.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Finding Words for What We Know ~

These few perceptive words I heard spoken yesterday: "It is a loving sustained attention that reveals beauty."

Criminal Activity ~

Now they are thinking of setting up a special police group to enforce non-smoking in restaurants. If you are caught smoking you can be fined anywhere from 20 to 2,000 Euros.

Friday, April 27, 2007

Blacksburg, Virginia ~

Virginia Tech University

Shooting on campus. 32 dead, 21 wounded.

The locals said the winds rose to carry the angels down so they could take the children home.

Is There Any Consolation? ~

In the vinyards along the Rhein near here a 13 year old girl was abducted on her way home from school and murdered. No clues. And yesterday in Heilbronn, a city known for its ties with the Romantic literary tradition, a 22 year old policewoman was shot in the head and died. No clues. She had just finished her training for the profession she had always dreamed of, had just found boyfriend with whom she had fallen in love.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Someone is Greeting You ~

For anyone who happens upon this blog, I hope this is an uplift for the day.

Saturday, April 14, 2007

From Tamara ~

Dear Charles,
Hopefully everything is ok in your part of the world. However, the growing anti-semitism in Germany and the rest of Europe does not make me very happy.

I wrote to a selection of different places with the emails you gave to me but nobody answered. In my opinion it does not fit the Europe I knew, even when the answer is in the negative, but this was apparently the world of yesterday. I am learning every day not to have expectactions and just be thankful for what I have and what comes.

I hope that you are in a creative period. New events are happening all of the time in the world and in the lives of individuals and especially for people who are creating. I want to share with you a new site of my art of 2006 with some of the poetry I have written. I am together with an American sculptor who in my opinion is doing unusual works having to do with the Holocaust and the journey of souls to another dimension.  
http://etherealjourney.com/
I hope to hear from you.
Warm regards,
Tamara

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Good Friday Liturgy ~

Stood in the choir loft on Good Friday and sang. The atmosphere was overwhelming. The sad tonality of the singing, the absence of organ and lighting and the half-darkness in the nave, the eery porcession with cross. It was later, after the ceremony, that I noticed what it had done to me, causing an extreme down-heartedness, mixed with a strange kind of joy. I was unable to shake it off on Easter Sunday and on into the week.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Search for Something New ~

Read in the newspaper this morning that the first victim of "coma boozing" died this week. This is the lastest fad among teenagers here in Germany.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

World's Oldest Benedictine Monk ~

He recently turned 106. He is doing just fine. At 99 he started to learn Spanish. When he was 100 he set out to learn how to operate a computer. His ardent desire: to one day go home to his Maker.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Lighting Up the World ~

Just think for a moment what it would be like if a baby couldn't do this.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Concert: J. S. Bach, Mass in B minor ~

When the concert ended there was dead silence, a pause of 135 seconds before audience started to applaud.

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Displaced Persons ~

There was a remarkable show on German TV the last two evenings. It was the story of aristocratic German family in East Prussia that had to flee, along with their indentured servants, among whom there were several French prisoners, from the approaching Russian armies in 1945. I had read an account by another person who had gone through the same harrowing experience, Marion Hedda Ilse Countess Dönhoff in her book: Names No Longer Used: East Prussia - People and History. She participated in the resistance against Hitler's National Socialists with Helmuth James Graf von Moltke, Peter Yorck von Wartenburg, and Claus Schenk Graf von Stauffenberg. After the war, she became one of the leading German journalists and intellectuals.


A close friend of mine made the trek with his parents from Breslau to Bavaria when he was just four years old.

Friday, March 02, 2007

General Robert E. Lee ~

Then I ran across this observation by the famous Civil War tactician:

"It is well that war is so terrible, else we should grow too fond of it."

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Dixie Chicks: No Ready to Make Nice ~

Bought that CD, Taking the Long Way, by the Dixie Chicks. I like their singing, especially Not Ready to Make Nice. Full of emotion set to feisty lyrics.

In light of their Bush statement in 2003, these girls have shown us an admirable courage.

Friday, February 16, 2007

J. S. Bach ~ Mass in B minor ~

Preparations are going well for our performance of this sublime work in March. I am able to sing passages that I never thought I could sing. It is amazing. It must be the woman who is directing us. Somehow her enthusiasm, knowledge and love for music awaken something in me that makes what little singing talent I have actually better than it has ever been. And also, it is the challenge of trying to keep up with the genius of Bach.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Reverses ~

Someone asked me if I could remember how practically the whole world was behind the U.S.A. just after Nine-Eleven. How much goodwill toward our nation has been destroyed?

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

God's Search ~

The old monk said: God is busy searching for you. That is why He keeps tugging at your heart.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Snow Welcome ~

Our first winter snow has finally arrived and made our village over again. Everything seems to be new and fresh. When I stand at my window and look out into the white I begin to feel that inside me some such change in my interior landscape might have happened, unnoticed, like a snowfall during the night. On awakening though, I am completely astonished at the change that has been brought about.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Morning Spectacle ~

At seven thirty in the morning when I take my walk I look up into the eastern sky and there is the morning star. The sky is bright already and other stars have disappeared, but the morning star still graces the heavens. Near it this morning there was a thin sliver of the waning moon.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Christmas Gift ~

Two weeks before Christmas an old student of mine, an '82 grad, called and said he just wanted to hear my voice. I was so moved I was lost for words.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Tom's Passing ~ One Year Ago ~

It has been a year now since we buried Tom. I visited his grave today and took flowers to his wife. I visit the gravesite often. Always bringing my problems and needs there and I stand and listen to what he has to say. I feel he is looking out for me, just like in the old days.